High school is most likely the largest pit
where jealousy and hatred manifests itself among teenagers. It’s much like the
infamous Greek goddess of discord Eris tossed her golden apple into to, just so
the all sorts of anger would swell into an epidemic. The judgment, lies, and
rumors clasp on someone’s tongue; within contact with anyone, they catch the
illness. The judgment, lies, and rumors clasp their tongue as well and it
continues to repeat itself. You eventually hear the judgment, lies, and rumors
about others as well as about you. At first, maybe you were in a seething rage.
“How could anyone, especially ____ say that about me?” But after so many
tell-tales, you eventually seize the acknowledgement and emotion. Maybe even
begin to question yourself as a person…
It’s probably just me, but I still get surprised when I
catch someone talking about me or when someone tells me what someone else has
said about me. It’s more like, “Wow, people talk about me? I’m that interesting
to discuss about?” Whether it is negative or positive feedback, I’m still
shocked regardless. Yet, I have faced people telling me what others have said
in a negative point of view. The labels that people brand you with, I swear. I
have heard three main words to describe me as: Emo, Anorexic, and Fat.
Sure, I was somewhat suicidal in my early high school
career. Most teenagers (if not all) sometimes have those thoughts, some harm
themselves in some way. I did harm myself in grief, but what can I say? I guess
I was just a troubled girl, trying to figure out this mathematical problem
called Life. As for the word Anorexic, I lost weight rapidly my last year of
middle school, but I have slowly gained my weight back within time (I’m certain
many of you have noticed). I don’t like discussing my weight, it’s just a
number. Why is my weight such an issue for you or anyone else? I’m a person and
I am always going to grow and change in many different ways, just like you will
within time. Everyone changes within time, both appearance and mind. The Fat
word is about the same as I just explained with the Anorexic word.
I’m certain I have been called worse, for that I don’t wish
to know. It honestly does me no favor to know, that is why I rather block out
the people hovering near discussing about me in depth. People that I know have always
said, “If you have something to say about me, say it to my face.” I’m the one
out of that category, muttering to myself, “I’d rather not know.” I use to end
up questioning myself and personality just because a person has classified me
as a certain label. Am I that girl? Am I that
word?
I am guilty for being swept up in the rumor pool, believing
what I hear from just one person. Then again, I was in high school. I was dumb
and naïve like most kids are at that age. I am doing my absolute best not to
get caught in the net and spill any sort of judgment. Yet, just because I am no
longer in high school doesn’t mean I don’t hear it in adult settings. Such as
at work, especially at the Rochester McDonald’s (a.k.a. Drama Central) since a
bunch of middle-aged women have nothing better to do than to talk about someone
to another who happens to be right beside them. Now that is not
saying all of the women there that I worked with snickered and cackled about
others, don’t get me wrong. I’m just saying a majority of them did.
If someone decides to talk about you and you catch their
word by another, just not acknowledge the existence of that rumor. People are
going to believe what they hear from one-side of the story, many (if not all)
concoct these ridiculous tales just to see how you’ll react to it. If your
friends think you should hear what someone else has said, tell them, “I
appreciate you being my friend and letting me know this, but I’d rather not
know. It’s no value to me.” (That is
unless you do want to know, it’s completely your decision). As for me, I am
living perfectly fine without knowing this and that said about me.
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